Some other beginning’s end

As I drove in to work today, observing the shafts of summer’s last sunlight cutting through the trees, I reminded myself that I would not make the same drive on Monday. Or the next day. Or the day after that. Today is my last day at this company and it feels very strange.

My cube-neighbor put together a good luck party on Tuesday, for which the calendar invitation read:

Goodbyes are the pits so instead we’ll have a GOOD LUCK party for RA. She doesn’t like surprises so she’s been informed about the event, but a separate email will come with details.

My co-workers assembled all of my favorite things to eat, which, when viewed in one place, compose the most random selection of foods. I had my choice of chili, caprese salad, Funfetti cupcakes with strawberry frosting, dill pickles, Swedish fish, Red Vines, and gummy bears. I have rather eclectic taste, I suppose, although the collective effect is a bit nauseating. I received a scrapbook of workplace pictures (my bridal shower, my birthdays, Halloween costumes), thoughtful notes, and puns! If that weren’t enough, we played a cutthroat game of Apples to Apples because it’s public knowledge that I am a board game enthusiast. I enjoyed all of the work they put into it, but the whole time, I couldn’t help but think, Man, they really have me down. It was almost spooky.

To get me through a packed week, I made aggressive to-do lists and took great pleasure in slashing through each item with a permanent marker. Each black line brought me that much closer to being finished and I relished the feeling. When I cleaned out my cube, I was startled to realize how much stuff I depended on to make my desk my own. Old birthday cards, fortune-cookie sayings, a lei from my bridal shower, and rubber ducks were all packed up into a copy box, along with a drug store’s worth of contact solution, hand lotion, lip balm, and nail files. I also seem to have a problem with hoarding pens and sticky notes; whoever comes to this workspace after me will be sufficiently equipped.

I’ve sent out my final goodbye to the company, told a select few colleagues about this little corner of the web (hi!), and checked off every e-mail in my Follow-up folder. I’ll shut down my laptop, leave it in my empty cube. Then I’ll glance over the gray desk and walls to make sure I didn’t leave anything behind. I will miss my co-workers dearly, but I’m not planning on coming back any time soon.

Onward and upward, friends.