Last night, JG and I arrived at home after a whirlwind weekend at my parents’ house in Connecticut for our early family Christmas. Between Friday night and Sunday, we spent twelve hours in the car and consumed countless calories. Although I’m not glad to be at work at the moment, I’m relieved to be home, since the trip was somewhat grueling. I find it odd to go back to my parents’ house for an overnight stay. We haven’t been back there for over a year, but I didn’t expect to feel so unnervingly disoriented, as though someone had hidden the map, even if I should have known my way around.
Part of the problem was that I literally didn’t know where things were. My mom renovated the kitchen over the summer, so when I started to make cookies, I had a constant stream of questions about where I could find a whisk, the granulated sugar, a wire rack. I felt oddly out of proportion in the house, too. I asked if the kitchen stools had been shortened to accommodate the new kitchen island; no, they were always that short. The Christmas tree seemed smaller, as well, but that didn’t make sense because I haven’t grown an inch for ten years. Sleeping arrangements were off kilter because my bedroom has been turned into a study for my mom, which I don’t mind at all. JG and I slept in my sister’s bedroom, on my old day bed, which was weird all around. I felt out of place in my sister’s bed room, lying on my childhood bed, next to my husband, who certainly wasn’t around when I last slept on it with any frequency. Maybe it’s just strange to me to be married and sleeping in my parents’ house.
I think this disorientation is indicative of what continues to be an awkward transition into oxymoronic adult childhood. My parents and I seem to have trouble adjusting to the coexisting facts that they are my parents, but I am adult. Somewhere along the lines, either the system or I changed (or both, I guess), such that the two no longer meshed in an intuitive way. While I felt completely at home in the snowy, gray, muffled world of New England winter, my parents’ house, while comfortable and warm, was oddly foreign. I know that I have made my own world with JG that consists of our house, Ted, and our friends, but feeling like an exchange student in my childhood home was a jolt to my system, even though it was good to spend time with my parents and my sister.
As much as I don’t savor the thought of coming in to work all this week, I know it’ll be quiet in these parts, and I’m grateful that we can spend all of Christmas Day at home. As I sit in an eerily quiet hallway, I count down the minutes until I can leave at noon, and unrelated thoughts flit across my brain. Should we pick up rolls to make sandwiches from leftover turkey? … I wonder if JG has wrapped Ted’s gifts … I need to stuff JG’s stocking … Tonight, we’re watching A Charlie Brown Christmas! … I have to do laundry … I really should order a new day planner for work … I need to take a nap before the Christmas Eve service … I can’t forget to call my grandmother tomorrow … Happy Birthday, Kip …
7 comments
I can imagine that would’ve been a pretty disconcerting experience, especially with things out of place in the new kitchen and sleeping in your sister’s old room. I’m sure you’ll still have a great holiday, though. Merry Christmas!
Yes, it was nice to be back in Connecticut; I just didn’t expect to be so thrown off, if that makes sense.
Merry Christmas, RA!!
Merry Christmas!
Merry Christmas!
Since I moved out of my parents’ house, they have done some major renovating. Almost the entire floor plan has changed. The first time I went back and had to sleep in my brother’s old room, it was a little weird, but I have gotten used to it (spending approx. 1 weekend/month there will do that). It’s kinda nice for me, actually, because parts of the house are the same and feel like they always have, but the parts that are different reinforce the feeling that it’s my parents’ house, not mine. While it will always be “home,” it’s not my home anymore. And that feels good, in a way.
That is a nice balance to strike. We haven’t been back to my parents’ house for quite a while, so I don’t expect it to be this pristine museum of my childhood. It was just weird.
My mom redecorated my bedroom as soon as I left for college! My parents’ house has never quite felt the same since then. Fortunately, her bizarre kitchen organizational system has remained. It makes no sense, but I have it all memorized perfectly.
I had my mom’s kitchen down, too! That is, until she had the nerve to renovate it so that it is a fantastic, enviable, lovely space that I want to steal. The island alone is so big that I can lie down on it and roll around! Ah, well.
I can’t imagine how it’ll be coming home from college next year to a different house (because I’m almost positive that my parents are going to either really change the house around or move to a different house completely as soon as I’m away at school).
My in-laws moved as soon as their youngest child left for college, too, and apparently, it’s not all that uncommon. Their new (-ish, it’s been two years) house feels odd because it’s all of their familiar stuff in a strange setting.
Going back to my mom’s house is still weird for me. Her boyfriend is very allergic to cats, so they took over my old room (up in a loft, where the cat was always afraid to go — therefore, dander-free). Now when I go back, I can either sleep on the same air mattress that my mom and her boyfriend sleep on (weird) or sleep in my mom’s room (weird). We’ve opted for mom’s room on the last two visits, and it’s just… weird.
Wow, that’s a whole lot of weird and potential weird going on. For me, a girl who was not allowed to have a boy even ascend to the second floor, sleeping in my childhood bed next to JG just seems wrong.
I’m glad that you appeared to enjoy Xmas at home - it was good to see you. It’s always like that when you go away and come back. I don’t think fully relaxed until I was in my little car, speeding across along the highway home.
Anyway, I just read this post - of course, I’m totally late - and your happy birthday wishes to Kip and became a little sad. I thought, does she know *another* Kip? That was a very shocking week all around.
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